Pride and Mourning
by kkann
Summary: At first Obi-Wan isn't sure what's more unsettling-the sheer determination that plagues the boy or the fact that in the back of his mind he has to convince himself not to fear him. *End of TPM; Obi-Wan and Anakin deal with the loss of Qui-Gon.* One-shot.


__Initially this was part of the _'A Pod-Racing Jedi and a Queenly Senator' _story I had posted. But due to the fact that the story wasn't headed in the direction I'd wanted it to and generally because I thought these vignettes worked better as one-shots posted on their own it's being dismantled.  
>Originally posted: 421/11.__

"True humility is intelligent self respect which keeps us from thinking too highly or too meanly of ourselves. It makes us modest by reminding us how far we have come short of what we can be."_ -Ralph W. Sockman  
><em>**A/N: **A random drabble with Padawan!Anakin and Master!Obi-Wan bonding shortly after the Battle of Naboo.

I must say, these short bursts are quite fun to write. :)

* * *

><p>Today Obi-Wan Kenobi realized that Anakin Skywalker was quite apt at breaking his heart.<p>

The young boy stared in awe at the rain, one hand absently toying with the braid newly stitched to his scalp and the young Jedi did little to suppress the soft smirk at his newly acquired Padawan's antics.

"It's quite something, isn't it?"

Kenobi bent down only slightly in order to be heard over the roar of water.

Anakin nodded numbly.

Qui-Gon would have found something beautiful and extraordinary in the precipitation; Obi-Wan only saw it as a deterrent from dashing outdoors to whatever exploits awaited him.

But he was not Qui-Gon and he did not plan to be.

"Does it rain on Coruscant a lot?" Anakin whispered for fear of breaking the otherwise peaceful silence. His hands fell limply to his sides, swaying in the damp breeze. He stared forward into the vibrantly moist Nabooan landscape and then reluctantly tore his gaze away to glance up at his new Master.

Obi-Wan barely pursed his lips in brief thought. "Not quite."

The young boy's murmuring did well to convey his dismay at the taller man's response.

Obi-Wan was suddenly overcome with the urge to apologize for the city planet's otherwise unremarkable weather. Instead, he gave a light smirk and promised to take the new Padawan Skywalker to Kamino one day, just to spend hours in the rain he'd grown up without.

The pod-racer from Tatooine gave the largest smile he could muster given the recent circumstances, which only served to display a lop-sided grimace he attempted to mask with a grin.

In silence they turned back to the rain and let it purify the battlefield as a lone Gungan tramped his way back home through the metallic wreckage.

"Are we ever going to see them again, Obi-Wan?"

The inquiry had caught the man in question so off-guard that he visibly flinched as his thoughts collided with one another. Anakin stared up at him so earnestly that for a brief moment Kenobi feared the consequences of lying to him. He let the question sink into the ground around them before granting the boy a response.

"I don't know, Anakin."

The boy frowned and turned away from the Jedi, and Obi-Wan watched as a shadow passed through his features. The man found himself overwhelmed by the sudden desire to appease the fledging Jedi and renege his statement.

"Nothing is definite yet, Padawan." He said, looking straight at the boy who'd immersed himself in studying the smoldering remains of the battle droids with a look of grave disappointment. "If there is ever a time when Naboo needs us back or we are required to visit, you shall be the first I tell." He looked back at a memory of the man they were in mourning of and a grin played at his lips. "It's all the will of the Force, young one."

"I'm sorry about Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan." Anakin cut in abruptly, clenching his small jaw. "If I could have done something, I would've. I didn't know you were fighting that monster alone, but I wouldn't have known what to do."

Obi-Wan folded his arms into the sleeves of his cloak, absently taking a step back into the shadows of their overhang.

"It's not your fault." He interrupted whatever Kenobi had been about to question and finished his thought for him. "I'm not saying that you're supposed to think it is, it's just that I have a feeling that you think what happened to Qui-Gon is your fault."

He turned and squinted up at the Jedi Knight. "You don't want to train me to be a Jedi, do you?"

Kenobi didn't respond and glared out into the increasingly harsh weather at the thought of the triumphant smirk stretched across Darth Maul's face.

The first Padawan to face a Sith and live to tell about it and the sense of victory was fairly hollow.

"I never said that, Anakin." Obi-Wan all but shot back, part of him prepared to jump on the defensive.

"You didn't have to." The Padawan muttered to himself, resolutely folding his arms. "And you don't have to teach me if you don't want to. No one's going to force you to."

Obi-Wan remained muted, and suddenly the absence of his Padawan braid felt much heavier than it should.

"Just… don't send me back to Tatooine."

Kenobi did not feel remorse, he felt _compassion_. In that moment his heart went out to the boy's uncontrollable plight.

The rain came down a little harder now.

"But…I _want_ to be a Jedi, and even more than that, something tells me I _need _to be." His face was set in stern resolution and he took a breath to steady himself.

"But not just any Jedi." His head shook just barely. "There's something else I need to do, but I'm not sure what it is yet."

There was a sense of dark determination about the boy, and something didn't settle well with Obi-Wan when it came to just how far Anakin may be willing to go to achieve that unattainable status.

"I'm gonna make you proud, Master, I promise."

But before pride comes humility and some lessons are only learned through pain.

What Obi-Wan doesn't tell him is that he thinks he already has.


End file.
